Winning Sole Custody in California: A Comprehensive Guide

Winning sole custody in California—especially in San Bernardino County—requires strategic planning, strong evidence, and a clear understanding of what the court looks for. Many parents enter the courtroom believing that their love for their children is enough. Unfortunately, it’s not. Judges follow specific legal standards. If you’re not prepared to meet these standards, your custody case could fall short.

This guide outlines the key steps, legal standards, and local insights necessary to increase your chances of winning sole custody in San Bernardino County family court.

Understanding Sole Custody in California

Sole custody refers to either sole legal custody, sole physical custody, or both.

• Sole legal custody means one parent has the exclusive right to make decisions about the child’s health, education, and welfare.

• Sole physical custody means the child primarily lives with one parent, who is responsible for day-to-day care.

  
  

California courts generally prefer joint custody. However, they will award sole custody when it is in the child’s best interest, especially when concerns about abuse, neglect, mental instability, substance use, or one parent’s lack of involvement arise.

How the San Bernardino Family Court Evaluates Custody

San Bernardino County follows the California Family Code, particularly Sections 3011, 3020, and 3040. These sections emphasize the best interest of the child as the controlling standard. Judges in this county often manage heavy calendars, so they look for well-organized, evidence-backed requests that demonstrate why joint custody is not appropriate.

Key factors the court considers include:

1. History of parental involvement (who has been the child’s primary caregiver).

2. Evidence of abuse or domestic violence.

3. Substance abuse or mental health issues affecting parenting.

4. The child’s wishes if they are mature enough (usually age 14+).

5. Stability and continuity in the child’s current environment.

   
   

Step-by-Step Guide to Building a Strong Sole Custody Case

1. Document Everything

Judges don’t make decisions based on feelings or accusations—they rely on facts. Keep a custody journal documenting drop-offs, no-shows, concerning behavior, and communications. Screenshot messages, save emails, and obtain school or medical records that show inconsistent involvement or harmful conduct by the other parent.

If the other parent has failed to use scheduled time, made threats, or placed the child in dangerous situations, present this evidence clearly in your declaration. Support it with exhibits whenever possible.

2. File the Right Paperwork

In San Bernardino County, custody requests are usually filed through an RFO (Request for Order). You’ll need to complete:

• FL-300: Request for Order

• FL-311: Child Custody and Visitation Attachment

• FL-105: UCCJEA Declaration

• FL-150: Income and Expense Declaration (if support is also at issue)

  
  

You can request professional help preparing these through Gramling Law Group’s document prep services.

3. Address Domestic Violence Concerns Clearly

If your request for sole custody is based on emotional, physical, or financial abuse, you may need to file a DVRO (Domestic Violence Restraining Order) concurrently or prior to the RFO. In San Bernardino, judges frequently consolidate custody with DVRO hearings. Be ready to show a pattern of abuse, not just isolated incidents.

When domestic violence is proven, Family Code section 3044 creates a rebuttable presumption that it is not in the child’s best interest to grant custody to the abusive parent.

4. Be Specific in Your Parenting Plan

Judges prefer clarity. Don’t just ask for “sole custody.” Define what that looks like in terms of:

• Who makes medical and school decisions

• Where the child will live

• When, if ever, the other parent may have monitored or limited contact

  
  

Be reasonable but protective. A clear, child-focused plan goes further than an emotionally charged plea.

5. Consider Using a Child Custody Evaluation

In high-conflict cases or when there are allegations of abuse, the court may order a 730 Custody Evaluation. In San Bernardino, these evaluations are often conducted by licensed psychologists who prepare a report after reviewing documents and interviewing both parents (and sometimes the child).

If you believe an evaluation will support your position, you may request one proactively under Family Code section 3111.

Common Mistakes That Hurt Sole Custody Requests

Many parents sabotage their custody case without realizing it. Avoid the following:

• Talking negatively about the other parent in front of the child

• Failing to follow current court orders

• Withholding the child without legal authority

• Sending hostile or threatening messages

  
  

Judges take these behaviors seriously. In San Bernardino, family court judges often view unilateral decisions or emotional outbursts as signs that you’re not willing to foster the child’s relationship with the other parent. This can work against you, even if your concerns are valid.

Local Practices in San Bernardino Family Court

San Bernardino County has multiple family court locations, including San Bernardino, Victorville, Barstow, and Joshua Tree. As of 2025, Rancho Cucamonga no longer accepts divorce or custody filings, so filings must be made elsewhere.

Family law departments in San Bernardino are often under time constraints. Judges expect your declarations to be concise, specific, and organized. Avoid overly long narratives and instead focus on timelines, evidence, and why joint custody is not safe or appropriate.

Should You Hire an Attorney or Go Pro Per?

Sole custody battles are serious. While self-represented litigants do prevail, it’s typically because they presented strong evidence and complied strictly with procedural rules.

If you are dealing with:

• A history of abuse or protective orders

• A difficult opposing party or their attorney

• Prior false allegations

• A risk of the child being taken out of state

  
  

…it is strongly recommended that you consult a lawyer. Gramling Law Group has extensive experience handling high-conflict custody disputes and can represent you or assist with document preparation if you’re handling the case yourself.

What Happens If the Other Parent Contests It?

If the other parent files a Responsive Declaration or appears in court to oppose sole custody, the court will often schedule a mediation through Family Court Services. In San Bernardino, mediation is mandatory before any custody hearing unless there’s a restraining order or a waiver granted.

After mediation, the case will either resolve through agreement or proceed to a custody hearing. At the hearing, both parties present testimony, evidence, and legal arguments. Sole custody will be granted if the judge finds that shared custody would pose a detriment to the child and that awarding one parent full rights better serves the child’s safety, stability, and well-being.

Conclusion

Winning sole custody in San Bernardino County isn’t easy—but it’s absolutely possible when you take the right legal approach. You must be thorough, organized, and focused on the child’s needs. The family court system is not there to punish the other parent, but to ensure the child is raised in a safe, stable, and healthy environment.

If you are ready to fight for what’s right for your child, Gramling Law Group is here to help you navigate the process. Whether you need full representation or just assistance with drafting and filing your documents, we have the experience to guide you.

Visit www.thegramlinglawgroup.com to schedule a consultation, or book your flat-fee custody services here.

Disclaimer: This blog post is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. Reading this post does not create an attorney-client relationship. For legal advice specific to your case, contact a licensed California attorney and request a formal consultation.